The year is ending...

I always seem to want to write these types of " looking back at it " posts way too early. I guess i'll just do another one when we are closer to December. I'm still mulling over what to do next year with my living situations. My parents house is calling me in weird ways. I miss the entirety of it all. I miss the security of living at home. Not that i don't love living alone because i know that's it's totally made for me. I am never going back to share housing again, i just don't think i can quite do that. I still want to move into a new apartment for all the usual typical reasons, new decorating opportunities, new bedroom, new views, new neighbourhood. Cheaper rent! But i also want to move back to my parents place because to me, doing that signifies that i'm actually a true grown up. I know that doesn't sound like it makes any sense but just listen to me. This is a really lame example but i think it sums it up quite well. It's like when someone lets you win at chess because it's your first go. That's what going back to my parents house is like. I've done the whole living out of home thing, i've managed my own funds and depended on nobody but myself for a whole year, i know i can do it another year easy but maybe i don't want to and maybe i want to go back to my parents house just because life is a big holiday for me now and i can float around as much as i want to. That's what it's like.
I miss the garden, the big wide windows, the absolute quietness of where they live and of course i miss being under the same roof as my father who's one of my favorite people ever.

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I have a feeling that this summer is going to be amazing. Something's happening and it's happening in the right way for this summer to be just amazing. I used to hate summer because i didn't like the heat, but i think this year i'll be able to hack it a bit better. I want to go to the beach, i want to hang out with my friends all day and all evening by the pool, i want to go on a road trip. I want to do everything basically. I'd even love to go on a holiday with my parents like when i was a teenager. I've been feeling nostalgic as of late because i've just been a witness to the own changes in myself and even though i love and welcome these changes, i still yearn for the comfort of the past in some abstract way. I'm really getting into entertaining as well. Just this week i've organised two things with my friends. Drinks on the balcony, hosted by me. This is the best thing about having your own place, you can have friends over and entertain, have dinner parties. It's so fun. I only dream of what it's like to be able to do this in a proper house! I went to Daiso the other day as i always do and bought some new homewares for entertaining. I got these really cute ice cream cone shaped glasses that are going to be perfect for smoothies ( i inherited my dad's food processor which he never ever used ).