Piece of Cake

 

Right now, i have enough funds to book a return ticket to Japan as well as provide myself accommodation too. The only thing i'm lacking is spending money. I wanted to go ahead and book my tickets and accommodation yesterday but my mum and dad won't let me. I know what you're thinking. You're 24, you can do what you like. But when you're still living with your parents, you have them in your ear all the time about what it is you've done wrong and i don't want to have to live with their criticisms everyday.  Mum guarantees me that she can find a better deal, but i doubt it. The fact she's promised it means i have something to hold against her though, so we'll see. The fact that I have enough money makes me feel good though. I can make it real any time i want to. Far out, i want to go to Japan so badly! I wasn't joking when i said that New York really gave me a case of the travel bug. Japan has been in my sights for ages so it's high time that i went. I can just imagine myself loving all the cute things that are there and shopping for weird and colorful clothes too. Of course, there'll be lots of day dreaming in cafes and elbows bent at the bars. I'll be enjoying their Sake and probably alone as well.

My dad is overly worried about the language barrier. He doesn't really want me to go at all to be honest because he's so anxious about all the things that could go wrong. If you ask me, I'm not that afraid at all. In fact, it's these times where we're forced to do shit that we don't want to do that I'm into ( not at the time but definitely afterwards ). I want to go be in Tokyo and feel like a nobody amongst the thousands of people, I want to wander the streets at my own pace, discover oddities, go to a cat cafe and perhaps most embarrassingly, just melt away into my own Murakami laced dream.

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I'm reading a book at the moment called 'Couples' by John Updike. It's seriously incredible. I usually write non-fiction, just bits about my feelings and my life but when it comes to fiction writing, i always have this tendency to write about married couples. I don't remember any short piece of writing i've done which doesn't feature some kind of dialogue between married couples. It's just two people, but the web of complexities that come with relationships, love and all that stuff is wildly intense. I'm thinking a lot about couples at the moment, especially when it comes to things like sex and marriage. Marriage fascinates me a little bit. The frustrating thing, is that I can't even pinpoint why. Whenever i see couples, i think, " You guys have made a vowel to be together forever". Or " I wonder what your private world is really like when it's just you two, behind closed doors". Creepy, right? Well, I can't help it. Couples really live in their own private worlds.
And this brings me to Sex as well. In the book, they paint sex out to be two things. One something mystifying and intense and two something primal and reflexive. People think sex is all bonding and emotional but sometimes it's downright basic. As basic as pooing, scratching your arms, sneezing or blinking. Something that has to be done to appease this urge that rises out of nowhere without your consent. Like when you want to scream out in pain at the doctors. Or when when you are so sad you just want to start crying on the tram in front of all the other passengers.