お久しぶり! ( long time no see )

OK, so that was the longest hiatus ever. And as lots of you probably already know because i just can't keep my mouth shut ever, that i am moving to Japan. For good ( if i can help it )
I've been avoiding my blog and basically just forgetting that it exists but now, i feel like it's time to revive it. There's way more to write about now anyway. Everything has been booked and sorted. I've got my accommodation sorted, i've purchased my tickets and yes i even have a job! The three most essential things to moving to a new country. All i've got to do now is get my Japanese bank account and a phone. After my trip to Japan in May, everything changed for me mentally. Like drastic change. Big time change. I thought, there is no way I can stay here in Melbourne and continue to complain and whine about nothing ever happening. News flash, i'm never going to get anywhere being in this city. It works for some but it definitely doesn't work for me. I have no children, no relationship and no career here. What's keeping me from relocating completely? Absolutely nothing. Before i had even left Tokyo, i was already applying for jobs and in one month after i returned to Melbourne, i found a job, a place to live and had enough money for an airfare. I am gone!

Riding the metro in Tokyo, i had this one thought drifting in my mind. "I know my life cannot truly begin until i move here". I knew on an instinctive level that there were going to be great things waiting for me in Japan. Weird, i know. Some people have trouble believing me but this has always been me. I've always lived on this half logical, half instinctive level where i just know by feeling. It's helped me out a lot. It's worked more times than it's failed and i knew in my heart of hearts that i had to live in Tokyo. I had to live in Japan. The language barrier doesn't phase me. I want to learn the language and to become fluent. When life drives you down and continues to drag you further down with it, there's no choice but to make a change. A big one at that. The more intense, the better. The more intense it is, the more you're fighting back against this pit you've felt your way in. I've learnt that sometimes, things just don't change. And even if they were to, you just can't be bothered waiting around that long to see it happen. If you have nothing keeping you back. Go far. The further away the better. I want to invent a whole new persona of me when i'm in Tokyo. A better version of me where i'm not down and out, not nego and not weird about things. I don't want to take any of the Melbourne me to my new home. I know i deserve way better than what i've had here and it's up to me to start all over again in this place that i fell in love with so quickly.

I have about 1 month and 2 weeks before i leave. I've been planning goodbye drinks with the special people that really matter to me here in Melbourne. I'll miss them for sure. The next time they see me, i'll be a different person to the one that i am here. I hope i won't have anymore of the negativity that i have now hanging around me when i see them. You can expect more updates from me in the coming months. Thanks so much for reading and sorry to those who come back and check and find nothing. I know how shit that feels.

xx