Fourth day in feels...

I've read so many articles on the internet about being an expat and one of the many themes include the 'stages' that you pass through once you move to a new country. First, of course is the honeymoon phase where everything is new and amazing. Secondly, you get used to it and begin to see the flaws that were initially oblivious to you, thirdly you begin to get resentful and fourthly, you either leave the country or you stay and establish yourself as a permanent member of their society. For me, the honeymoon phase is over. That phase was my first trip to Tokyo back in May. Now, i'm in the "I see the flaws" phase. I see the flaws, the necessity for me to shut the fuck up and get on with it, the things that will probably hurt my feelings of living in a culture like Japan's and I accept all of it. And you know why? Because i'd rather adopt their ways than go back to Australia again. I'm not going to bitch about how much i hate Melbourne anymore. The fact that i would rather stay here in Tokyo than go back says more than words ever could. And plus, i've been wanting to be less bold, less in your face, less prone to advances for years. Being in Japan grooms one to be more retiring, considerate and secondary.

Yesterday, i went to my local ward office to register my resident card. It was such a relief that my friend Stella came because she's half Japanese and was basically my interpreter. I was pretty nervous for the entire time. I didn't want to have any complications and to be honest, i just wanted to get it done and leave as soon as possible. Once it was done, we headed to Daikanyama to look for a cafe to perch at. Unfortunately, because i didn't do any research we didn't find any. On top of that, the place was DEAD! I was so surprised. I thought it was a thriving, mini suburb full of hip cafes and cool shops ( the cool shops part was right, actually ). We eventually headed to Shibuya and chose this place underneath the cafe that we originally wanted to go to but was closed until 6PM. Sounds really trivial but i just couldn't wait to smoke inside. There's some weird pleasure i get in it. I took two black coffees and too many cigarettes.

On the way home, i was absolutely drenched. Head to toe. My shoes were making squelching sounds because they were saturated with water. I was embarrassed to go on the train because i was scared everyone was going to think i was gross but then second thoughts came to me and i realised that everybody was in the same boat. The only dry people were the sales assistants in the shops but give them five minutes out there after their shift and they'd be no better than Stella and I. Last night, i spent an hour practicing my Japanese with my housemate Mine. I also helped her with her English. It felt so rewarding to be imparting my knowledge which i totally take for granted onto someone who really wanted to learn. And there's absolutely no substitute for hearing the Japanese language spoken by a native. Today after this entry, i have to edit my book and do a bit of journalling. It's been four days since i've written in my journal and it feels wrong. I can't be away from it for too long. It helps me with organizing my mind. Tomorrow i'm going to open up a bank account. After that, all my Tokyo admin things will be done. Wish me luck :-)