New Job = New Life

It's hard to begin this entry because there's so much i really want to say.
What makes it even harder is that i have to beat the clock, my mouse begins fucking up if i use my laptop for too long so here we go. The number one point... ONLY NOW am i beginning to live the life that i deserve. The life which i longed for in Melbourne but had no way of being able to get. I had my doubts for the first couple of weeks here but that's ebbing away so quickly now that i've settled into my job. I began my job and i LOVE it. I love teaching English to the people of everyday Tokyo. I literally feel so rewarded every time their faces brighten up when they understand something. Whatsmore, all this stuff i'm teaching which is so mundane and banal to me is like a goldmine of value to them. Seeing how happy they are and how some of the students are so eager to learn really puts my english skills into perspective. We take for granted our ability to express ourselves so much. I feel a natural affinity with Japanese speakers because i know exactly what it's like to struggle with a language. The struggles that my students go through is exactly what i go through when i try to piece a sentence together in Japanese. I like how there's this understanding. I like how i get what they are going through.
I've signed up for a Japanese class which i think i'm going to go to on Tuesday. I did it today during my break at work. I like studying alone but i need reassurance that i'm going in the right direction. I look forward to actually being forced to speak it more and more. Believe it or not, you can actually survive pretty well here in Tokyo without knowing much Japanese. I suppose it is a major city, but i still find it weird how accommodating the city is to foreigners like me.

Seeing clients everyday at work is a real eye opener. These are people i pass everyday on the train, in the shops, on the street. Out in public, they are complete strangers. But as soon as someone walks into my booth at work, i get to know them personally and they don't feel so strange anymore. Being in Tokyo has shown me that beyond cultural differences, people are really just humans in the end. The cultural differences are big but scrape beyond that and everyone just wants to have a good conversation and feel comfortable with the people they are around. Everyone just wants to get 'real' at the end of the day. The people in my Learning studio are awesome and I love the area I work at. It's actually gorgeous. There's this big shopping centre with the most amazing clothes and food! Everything is basically gorgeous. I love being surrounded by all this gorgeousness haha! Everyone is so friendly and there's a great atmosphere too. I think back to my old job in Melbourne and realise how much i've been missing out on in terms of how we should really FEEL about our job. Of course, i know that our jobs can be a matter that is entirely out of our hands at times but i'm glad things turned out well for me. We shouldn't have to wake up dreading going to work. I've always known that and i'm lucky that i no longer feel that way.

Life should be lived and felt and experienced in the way that i am now. Like there's always more in the future to know, like there's so much to do and work on today and like yesterday was a stepping stone to something better. I sound so majorly corny right now but you would sound like this as well if you were going through what i went through. It's such a relief to finally not wake up feeling darkness and anger at the state of affairs. How long can we really put up with that shit before we go absolutely insane? Thank god.. thank fucking god i am on the path to the life that i want